Let's talk about this little guy right here:
Kason is a ball of energy. He always has been. He is a social, happy, easy-going, goofy, wild-child with TONS of energy. He can make you laugh with his one-liners or his stories and the faces he makes to go along with them just add charm. He makes friends everywhere we go. He is a GOOD kid. Just today I was thinking how easy of a kid he has always been, from the day we brought him home from the hospital. He was content enough in life to not want a pacifier. He rarely cried. Laughed a lot. Slept through the night early on. Potty-trained in a day. He was just an EASY, happy kid. If all my babies are like him, I will have 8! (In all honesty - I am terrified for our next kid...Kason set the bar pretty high for his siblings) For people who are "Children Whisperers" (by: Carol Tuttle) Kason is a through and through Type 1 child. Bouncy, random, animated ... just fun. Before I read 'The Child Whisperer' I will, unfortunately, admit that I wondered if Kason might have some level of ADD (a common misconception of Type 1 Personalities) but, the book changed my way of thinking. He is just that way. That's him and that's how he will always be.
Personally, I love that about him. Because, I am a Type 1 personality too, and it helps us have an awesome connection. I love my relationship with Kason.
I am a FIRM believer in allowing children to be themselves, let their personality define them and who they are ... NOT what a parent/teacher/friend wants from them.
{BE YOURSELF.}
Now, the real reason for me rambling is .... I'm at a loss of what to do. Because Kason is such a social kid, he likes LOVES to talk. He could talk your ear off. And he likes to daydream and not focus on what's going on around him. At home, this isn't a problem, because we've figured out ways to work around it and help him still be productive at home.
The real issue lies in school.
Kason is in Kindergarten this year. He loves it and it's SO good for him! Friends around him, ALL day long!? He's in heaven.
Well, his teacher, seems to be kind of strict. Which I understand is important in some situations, don't get me wrong. But, I also think that teachers, especially Kindergarten teachers, need to cut their kids a little break! Kids are kids, they are going to be wild and crazy and energetic. Well, my kid anyway.
So, at school they have a rating system for the day. Green, yellow & red. You can figure out what they mean, right? Kason ... gets stuck on Yellow a LOT. It gets pretty frustrating as a mom having him always come home with a yellow or a red because I want him to be successful in school. Academically, he is top of his class (so dang proud!) but, behaviorally, he's not. Sometimes the reasons he gets yellows are ridiculous "I accidentally whispered the answer to myself" or "I was tapping my pencil on my desk." To ME, those seem silly. Especially for Kason, who then comes home thinking 'I am such a bad kid.' ... In fact, he has told me on numerous occasions, "I'm so sorry I'm a bad kid because I come home with yellows and reds."
*cue the waterworks*
right? It kills me because we have never told him "You're doing so bad in school. How dare you get a yellow! You're such an awful kid. Go sit in your room and think about it for hours on end." But, he's a people-pleaser. He wants everyone to be happy. So, he automatically assumes, it makes him a "bad kid" when he gets in trouble.
One day, he wrote me the cutest note and slipped it under the bathroom door (will I EVER have peace and quiet in there?) that said, "I am sory I got a red. I love you."
Again, cue the tears.
He WANTS to behave in school but, because of who he is and his personality ... it's a real struggle for him. He loves learning, he just doesn't like to do it sitting still.
We have tried talking to his teacher and explaining this to her. But she still tells us his behavior is "out of control". I honestly have gotten to the point where I don't even flinch when he gets a yellow because I know he's just being himself at school. Probably the wrong attitude because I KNOW that he needs to learn how to listen in school and that he needs to learn how to focus ... but how do you teach that when he's not with you for 6 hours a day? And how do you get a teacher to work WITH you instead of being stuck on how she has always taught, and discipling each child exactly the same. I have told her a few things that work at home for disciplining and she says "Well, I don't really like to do that with my students." And I should have said, "Well, then you're not going to get the results you want with Kason." I didn't, because I don't have the guts. But, it's SO frustrating.
Anyway ... I am ranting about his poor kindergarten teacher who really does do a great job academically. He's reading and adding and subtracting numbers. He loves science. She does a good job. She really does. I just want her to see Kason the way Brad and I see Kason. He's an amazing little boy, and she's missing out on enjoying his personality and who he REALLY is because she's focusing on how "out of control" he is. I feel like she is keeping him from his full potential. I also feel like she is crushing his self-esteem despite any attempt at home to assure him that just because he gets yellows/reds, it doesn't make him a "bad kid". (I hate that label! HATE it!)
So, what do I do?
Honestly. Be honest with me!
Do I just let him keep getting yellows and not worry about it, because I know he's being himself?
Do I keep trying to convince his teacher to discipline him in ways that I know will work?
How can I make this a win/win situation for us at home and at school?
Maybe I just need to ride it out for 5 more months and call it a semi-successful year in Kindergarten. He can read, that's good enough, right?
But, I want him to be happy and successful at school, too, instead of just at home/church/with friends.
(that's the other funny part, his teachers at church adore him and say he is an amazing kid. THEY see his potential!!)
Okay ... am I being ridiculous? Do I need to just let this go, let her do her thing at school, while we worry about him at home? No, I know that's not the answer either!
So, what is the answer? Because we have yet to be able to figure it out. How can I get him to be successful in school? How can I help him learn to focus on what is going on instead of daydreaming?
Part of me also thinks that maybe he gets bored in school, so he has to do something with his boredom ... so he talks or goofs off. Or, part of me thinks that since he is an only child, he craves the attention from his teacher while he's at school, whether it's positive or negative.
Alright, enough about this. I want to know what you would do...
Ready...
Go!
{he's also a handsome devil, too, isn't he!? I love this boy so much ... can't he just be happy in all areas of his life?!}